Lunch Hour Lateness

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On the way home for lunch just now (I'm writing this from home over my lunchhour), I was spacing off and started singing along to a song on the radio. About two minutes in I realized it was a Wilson Philips song and the horror was two-fold. First, that such a horrible song wouldn't roust me out of my usual lunchhour drive home space off session to grab the remote and change the channel. Secondly, and perhaps worse, was that I subconsciously knew the words to a Wilson Philips song. You have to believe me when I tell you I haven't heard that song in 15 years, at least. Eighth grade, back when wearing neon green was cool. If I was lying, would I tell the story? Of course not. I'd bury it away. So you have to believe me. You bet.

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Thursday I met two of my buddies, Continental and Dick, for lunch at Indigo Joe's, the new sports bar and grill. Its all smoke-free, all the time, which is pretty dominant.

I got running a little behind getting out of the office, and when I did get out, I got to the corner and a semi-truck was attempting a U-turn. A U-TURN! With an 18-wheeler! A Big-Rig! Needless to say, he nearly tipped over twice, managed to get his tires stuck on the median, and eventually by sheer brute force completed the Uwey. But not before I sat for two minutes in sheer consternation, becoming more and more late by the second.
When I finally get going again, the car I'm following has a vanity license plate that says -- no kidding -- "NEVR L8". Unlike me, who because of Crazy U-Turn CDL Driver is late, this person is never late. Nice.

All goes well until 90th and Dodge, where I meet a Funeral procession that lasts through two green lights. At this point its high comedy. Funnier than most sitcoms, it is.

Did I mention the soundtrack to all this, as provided by XM 49 Big Tracks, was Frida's "I Know There's Something Going On"? It totally was. The early-80s song by one-fourth of ABBA, just after their acrimonious breakup, featured that big awesome drum machine beat put down by none other than Phil Collins. Not a big Phil Collins guy, but he does know how to use that drum machine, you have to give him that. One of my favorite 80s tunes.

Incidentally, I notice that song is in Kurt Loder's celebrity playlist on iTunes. Its the only song I recognize on his entire list, which is saying something since I have 8200+ songs in my library, and know of or have heard thousands more. This deserves its own entry, really, but its a guilty pleasure of mine to look at the celebrity playlists on iTunes. Not because I think "Wow, the random guy in the back cubicle on The Office has two John Mayer songs on his iPod, what a deuche!", but because its interesting what songs people pick to show the world. You can totally tell the ones trying to show off, because they always have eight or nine tracks from forgotten acts of the past and/or up-and-comers, with one Wham! song mixed in. I'm still waiting for someone to have the guts to put "Hold Me" by Menudo in their playlist. Just once. Somebody. Please.

Anyway, so the drum machine is going crazy, Frida is wailing about knowing something is up, I'm playing air drums in The Colorado with my giant shades on, the car next to me is laughing, and finally, the funeral procession is through and I can go. I get to lunch 10 minutes late, but with a story that good it hardly mattered.

You bet.

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This page contains a single entry by Max Univers published on May 3, 2006 9:32 PM.

Live From Random National Giant Chain Coffee Shop was the previous entry in this blog.

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